Friday, 22 January 2016

#10.

One thing I didn't bring up in my last blog is something that I only found out like last night okay so here goes..

I wasn't put on this earth to make people happy. I wasn't put here to impress other people. I'm not someone that personally gives a shit about what people think of me, I past caring when I got bullied but one thing in this whole entire world which I'll always continue to hate is two faced people.
Always in life you're going to encounter them but when people actually tell my boyfriend he deserves better, I think.. ''What the actual fuck? You're a middle aged woman that by the looks of it is a fucking predator. You practically flirt with your sons friends and that isn't weird?

But anyway enough of that negative hoe.

You don't need to feel bad for getting upset or hurt by someone dickheads opinion because they obviously aren't happy with their life whilst they're talking about a teenage boys relationship or whatever. You don't have to answer to anyone, who gives a fuck what people think about your relationship, your choices, your decisions!! It's non of their business to be honest boo.

I know people are gonna read this and be like what is this bish on, but this blog isn't only to help you guys, it's to help me too and this is my practically my online diary about mental illness, living with it and to talk about how it affects daily life. People's opinions effect me alot more than I care to admit, and this is why I'm actually kinda hurt when I get told when someone's first met me they fucking practically hate me. Like, you haven't given yourself a chance to know me so how can you place a judgement on me so quickly?

Also one last thing, if people are talking about you boo, it means you're doing something right. If they have to waste oxygen saying your name and other hateful things then they're hateful, pieces of insecure dog shit.

Have a good night.
Ox

#9.

Hey loves! So this blog is really personal to me and I really hope it's helping you, because to be honest it's to show you ALL that no matter how hard a day a day, a month, even a year.. it's always going to get better. just have patience and believe in YOURSELF.

Also, I'd just like to say thank you, to all of you reading this.. whoever you are, wherever you are, no matter what if you ever need a friend or just someone to speak too, always remember you're ALL welcome to leave a comment and I'll message you straight away..
Because lets be honest communication is one of the most important things in life, if someone makes you unhappy, tell them and talk about it!! Of course as always telling someone something that is really just bothering you is hard don't get me wrong but it's even harder to pretend everything's fine when you speak to that person.

As in alot of my blog's I've spoke of my relationship quite abit so far and I'm going to be pretty honest here.. We went through a blip, because when you've been dealing with an issue for so long by yourself it's so fucking hard to share your problems with other people especially the person you're in a relationship. How is someone supposed to know your worries, your concerns, or your insecurities and why you're so insecure when you haven't told them about it in depth? The only person that really knows is YOU and if you're wanting to move forward in your relationship you've got to feel secure and at least try to give them a chance to learn about you.

I have a rule with people, only one chance. People only get one chance with me and if they fuck up then I gotta bin them off, but there's certain times I can't stick by that because I can't forget how goddamn happy they've made me for months continuously.. Sometimes you've got to stop being stubborn and I'm not saying forgive people when they fuck up because trust me I don't and I definitely do not forget but when you love someone that's forever not until you both get bored.

Ox