Friday, 5 August 2016

DO i REALLY DESERVE THiS?

People change, I get that. But what I'll never understand is how a person can go from being the most attentive person, a person you plan to spend your life with, have babies an all that jazz to someone that's quite callous and completely a different character.

I'll never understand truly how someone who went from being the best thing in your life to someone that you just don't understand. I know I'm difficult and I know I always have more bad days than good but I've always been like that, I just hid it better.
I don't associate myself with people because I feel like they'll never understand, they won't understand why I do what I do and the whole reasoning behind it. I've always built this little shelter around me so I didn't give a fuck about anything and I realise that's not healthy and having emotions are completely normal. But I don't want to let somebody affect me that much.

I'm not even talking about in a relationship either, I just want to be able to know that another human being understands how I'm feeling. I've felt so alone for a while, I've got amazing people around me, I just can't change how I'm feeling.Whilst everybody around me is happy and content with life, I'm feeling lost and alone.
But nobody understands..

There's gonna be a few other posts tonight so that's why I've kept this one short.

Enjoy.

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