I noticed that my last post hasn't had as many views as all my others and it just bums me out that some days are just better to post for you all, my brain is always working overtime trying to think of really good ideas and I dunno, it doesn't matter..
I don't write about stuff I don't believe in, like I'm not going to support something that my heart doesn't believe in. The amount of people I've had to unfollow on twitter purely because they were trying to glamorize mental health - it is NOT something to glamorize.
Mental health is ugly, it damages you as a person like let's be real - eating disorders - anorexia, bulimia, body dysmorphia - I had anorexia, but when I got better, as I've always said with any disorder you'll have good days and BAD and when I had bad days after I got better I'd make myself sick - I'm not going to beat around the bush, I was feeling ill again and if I hadn't of started writing this blog I wouldn't be here right now. My anxiety was worse than ever, I was constantly paranoid and I'd push people away and I hated my body. Literally, I HATED it.
I'm writing this now to show people you aren't alone, when you feel lost and trapped please understand that the voices telling you 'you're ugly' 'you can't do this' 'you're a failure' will soon die down. Create a little box in your mind and put all the negative thoughts in it and lock it, it'll open itself now and again but then you've got to realise you've fought this bullshit before and it'll only make you stronger and whilst you get stronger - the voices get weaker. And weaker, and eventually they'll die down, until something may trigger it but remember YOU are so much more than this.
Now finally, a subject that is really close to my heart - bullying.
Bullying is way more of a recent thing nowadays, but one thing I have noticed is that children as young as 7 probably younger are getting bullied. The thing is, when you bully someone you just think of the now because it's funny to you - there's way bigger consequences to bullying someone, you can affect them physically and mentally by just saying cruel unnecessary words to them. I always got old 'if you haven't got anything nice to say about someone, don't say anything' and I feel like that needs to be drilled into people's heads, whether you're young or old - if you've been taught to be cruel or just a dick then you can easily be taught to be nice and compassionate to someone.
You NEVER know what someone's going through - just don't be a dick.
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