I'm SO grateful for everyone that has read this blog, this blog has now past 1000 readers!!! I think that's really incredible because I never really thought many people would want to even read it, I know many of you can relate and it genuinely makes me feel so good because this is slowly but surely ending the stigma of mental illness. I am so grateful for every one of you who reads this blog, because YOU help me and you don't even know it, I still suffer with severe anxiety and I'm still fighting the battle between me and eating disorders, I've not quite beat that...yet.
Writing a post every now and again it still hurts because I'm helping all of you and I love it don't get me wrong, but it hurts to keep thinking of how I fucked up, I practically ruined my health because of people's words. I isolated myself so much because I hated people, but I used to be a people person, if that makes any sense at all? I used to love going out with my mates and just knowing that the people I've surrounded myself with aren't fucking idiots you know, but obviously they did turn out to be fucking douchebags so maybe my gut instinct was right all along..
Right now, I've got one best friend. And yeah, he is the love of my life too, it's fucking strange how life works sometimes. And apart from him, I've got all of YOU, all 1007 of you, I'd literally love to get to know all of you, if anyone ever wanted to message me, you're more than welcome too!!
Anyway enough of that..
I posted a quote on my facebook the other day and I felt it was so freaking relevant..
''What's up with everyone self diagnosing themselves with anxiety. Let me just tell you. there's a difference between being nervous and having an anxiety attack. An anxiety attack is SO much more than just being nauseous. Just because you are anxious every once in a while. Doesn't mean you have anxiety. Not to sound like an asshole but I'm sick of it because nobody understands how hard it is to actually live with anxiety and not be able to do things because of it, and nobody ever takes me serious about it because apparently everyone has anxiety.''
There are far too many people self diagnosing themselves when really they would fucking kill not to have anxiety, let me just tell you this from someone who has had anxiety for years..
It's excruciating, literally. There's been so so many times I've thought how easy would it be to just not be here anymore, I wouldn't have to face my fears nearly every time I go out, I wouldn't have to be scared about just doing something so simple as to walk my freaking dog. I've seen so many people post on facebook all these long status' about having mental illness and that's all well an good but the thing is if you feel so so bad about yourself, why would you post it all over social media?
Never ever say you've got a mental illness just for attention because it ruined my life for so many years and I've heard about so many people who have ended their lives over it, so just don't do it. There's no need to be an attention seeker. duh. There's been so many young people that have missed out on getting the help they desperately need because the NHS (in the UK!) has waiting lists so there could be some people that just feel abit nervous every now and then whereas there's some people that literally feel sick about the thought of going out so it takes longer and longer for the people that really need the help to get it because of all this..
Love and look after yourselves.